


Backup

by linndechir



Category: Deus Ex (Video Games)
Genre: First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-24 06:37:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17699474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/linndechir/pseuds/linndechir
Summary: Adam patches Jim up after a mission they were lucky to survive at all.





	Backup

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Masu_Trout](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masu_Trout/gifts).



“You’re going to be all right,” Adam said as he finished fastening the bandage around Jim’s arm. It was too cold to be shirtless in the large warehouse, or maybe it was the blood loss that made Jim shiver slightly. 

“I know,” he said automatically, both because he did know and because the last thing he needed or wanted was for Adam to start fretting over him. 

Adam looked up, studied him for a moment with those startling green-golden eyes. Jim was still getting used to seeing them every time they were alone now. For months he’d been faced with the impenetrable mirror glass of Adam’s shades every time they spoke. If it hadn’t been for the pictures in Adam’s file, Jim might have assumed that those shades couldn’t even be retracted. Actually getting to see Adam’s eyes felt inappropriately intimate, even more so since they were as expressive as the rest of Adam’s face wasn’t. Sometimes, in moments like this, they barely even needed to talk much anymore; Adam only scoffed a little. After all, both of them would likely try to shrug off far more serious injuries rather than let someone fuss over them.

Jim’s body ached in more ways than just the numb burn in his shoulder where a bullet had grazed him. He was as fit as a man his age could possibly be, but he wasn’t young anymore, and it had been years since his job had required crawling through mud and dirt all day, lying in wait for hours and then fighting quite literally for his life. It still didn’t make him miss the piles of paperwork waiting for him on his desk once he’d return from the few days off he’d taken to give Adam the fire support he’d needed. Jim was tired and sore and his knees hurt, but he still felt elated in that way that only beating the odds in a fight ever made him feel.

“Didn’t think that would work,” he said, more to himself. Even knowing what Adam could do, it seemed insane that they’d both made it out of this alive and more or less unscathed. Adam looked up from the small first-aid kit, and the skin around his eyes crinkled in amusement. He always seemed so cool, so contained, not counting the few times Jim had seen him lose his temper, but there was a reason he _liked_ to jump out of airplanes and take on small armies on his own even when backup was available, and thought sneaking past half of Prague’s trigger-happy cops during curfew was just a nice evening workout.

“Of course it did. I had backup,” Adam said. He didn’t quite smile, but there was a flash of something warm in his eyes – and Jim still wasn’t entirely sure how that worked, how it was even possible for those augmented eyes to express emotion. Maybe he simply saw what he wanted to see. Or maybe it was that everything else in Adam’s demeanour had changed and made Jim feel like there _should_ be something warm in that expression – the way Adam spoke to him now, more honestly and without constantly seeming to hold something back. The way he looked at him, without the shades masking his expression, the way he stood closer and on one or two occasions after London even touched his shoulder. It was as if a switch had been flipped, but Jim supposed that made sense. If you lived in the world Adam lived in – the world Jim had been drawn into – then trust could only be absolute.

“Some backup I was, getting myself shot,” Jim said dryly. He knew it hadn’t exactly been his fault that someone had found him – the way things had gone down, Adam had needed him to stay where he was and keep shooting, not change his position often enough to throw off anyone looking for the sniper. He felt like it was his fault that he hadn’t been able to fight them off by himself – wondered if he would have managed, ten or twenty years ago, or if back then that same situation would have ended with a bullet in his head rather than his arm because back then he wouldn’t have had Adam to come save his arse. Jumping up from a storey below in a flurry of black and gold, moving faster and with a deadly precision that even as a young man Jim could have only dreamt of. He knew Adam tried to avoid killing when he could, but today the blades had been out, cutting throats and crippling limbs like he’d stepped right out of some anti-Aug propaganda film. His hand had been warm and slick with blood when he’d pulled Jim to his feet, his voice as gruff as ever and still doing a bad job hiding his concern when he’d asked Jim if he was all right. The shades had come off just then, and when Adam saw the blood on Jim’s arm, there was something else I his eyes, too – fear almost, and guilt. Jim had insisted on coming along, no matter how much Adam had argued that he could do this alone. And Jim knew him well enough – or maybe they were just similar enough – that he could easily imagine the thoughts going through Adam’s head in that moment. That he should have insisted more, that he shouldn’t have told Jim about his plans in the first place, that he certainly shouldn’t have let him come along. That it would have been his fault if anything more serious had happened to Jim.

Adam tugged lightly on the bandage to adjust it, and this time his hand stayed on Jim’s arm when he was done. His fingers didn’t feel unpleasant on Jim’s skin – unusual, yes, the pads slightly rough, the material cool and sleek, but it wasn’t like touching a piece of machinery. There was something unmistakably human in the careful way Adam’s fingers brushed over his skin, a light caress down to Jim’s forearm that raised goosebumps on his skin. Adam certainly hadn’t touched him like this before. It had always been comradely, but this was … tender, and Jim hadn’t lost enough blood to excuse that thought.

He was well trained enough that his heartbeat and breathing had long returned to normal, but there was still that tension in his entire body that followed a fight. Nerves tingling at every touch, senses heightened to the point where every small sensation felt like the whole world was shifting around him. That touch on his arm, the warmth of Adam’s breath on his face, the smell of his sweat. They were so very close, closer than they’d been – since London, now that Jim thought about it, since Adam’s hand on his shoulder as he made him drink the antidote that had saved his life.

Adam was looking at him again, but there was something hesitating in his expression now, in the way his fingers stilled on Jim’s skin. Uncertainty, like he wasn’t sure he could trust his eyes, as if they didn’t easily beat out Jim’s 20/20 vision and had a CASIE to help them interpret their input on top of that. Jim doubted anyone would have needed a CASIE to read him in that particular moment, though. Adam’s gaze, his touch, made him feel raw to the bone.

There were reasons why they shouldn’t do this. Jim could think of three without even trying, and he’d tried very hard over the past months. Reminded himself of every single one of them during long nights when he couldn’t sleep, couldn’t close his eyes without thinking about the brush of those fingers against his skin, without wondering what he’d have to do to make Adam smile more and what Adam would sound like if Jim buried his fingers in his hair and pulled him close.

And maybe that was the blood loss, too, and the adrenaline pounding through his veins, and the rush of excitement he’d seen in Adam’s eyes earlier, but all those reasons seemed like they belonged in a different life now. Back in Prague, back in a too bright office stuffed with paperwork and a too bright flat with divorce papers, back in a life full of rules and forms and regulations, a life that in its own depressing way still made sense. They didn’t belong in a cleared out secret research facility Adam had cut through like a hot knife, they didn’t belong in a world where the Illuminati were not just a crackpot theory by some nutters on a message board. If the world didn’t operate by the rules, what point was there in Jim still following them to the letter?

Maybe they’d both regret this as soon as they were back on a plane home, but right now Jim couldn’t bring himself to give a damn. He covered Adam’s hand with his own and only tightened his grip gently when Adam wanted to pull back as if caught. When he kissed him, he felt simultaneously as if the ground was pulled out from underneath his feet and as if the world finally came into focus again. He kissed him with a desperation he hadn’t known he felt until this very moment, until Adam’s lips parted against his and he moaned helplessly into the kiss.

Just a split second later Adam’s arms were around him and Jim’s own hand grabbed Adam’s hair, drew another soft gasp from lips that were every bit as eager as in Jim’s guiltiest fantasy. It was uncomfortable, with him still sitting and Adam leaning down to press against him, and there was something unsettling about the hardness of Adam’s arms against his sides, but it still cost Jim every last bit of self-discipline he could muster to break the kiss and ignore the barely suppressed whimper that left Adam’s lips. Adam’s eyes were wide, surprised and needy, and Jim wanted nothing more than to bend him over the next fucking desk and find out what other sounds he could get out of him.

“Not here,” he heard himself say. It sounded like he was trying to convince himself as much as Adam. “We can’t … we need to get out of here.”

“Just a minute, Jim.” Adam’s voice was hoarse with want, and he didn’t give Jim time to reply before he kissed him again. Jim barely remembered to breathe, and he sure as hell forgot the pain in his arm when he reached out to grab Adam’s and yank him closer again. At least the pain that shot through him made it easier to pull away a second time, their faces still close enough that it was so very tempting to keep kissing him and not stop unless someone started shooting at them.

“Jesus, Jensen. We don’t want to be here when someone sends _them_ backup.” He let go of Adam’s hair, brushed his knuckles over Adam’s cheek instead, watched him lean into the caress as if nobody had touched him in years. Jim took a moment to stroke his face gently, retraced his jaw line, then touched his thumb to Adam’s bottom lip. “I’ll get you home and then we can have all night, how about that, hm?”

He barely made it a question, but Adam still nodded, and the eagerness in his expression made Jim shudder as much as Adam’s lips when they pressed a soft kiss onto his thumb. For a long moment neither of them moved, too reluctant to give up on something they’d both wanted for far too long. Jim let out a tense sigh when Adam finally straightened up and moved out of his space. He handed Jim his blood-stained clothes before he started picking up his own gear.

He seemed to be all business again while they got ready to leave, except for that damned quirk of his mouth when he turned to Jim and said, “We better get going then.”


End file.
